Resolutions

It's that time. It's New Year's Eve. I hate this day actually. I hate looking back at the year that passed and saying "Man, I just didn't do anything that I wanted to do". This year, it seems to be a lot of that. But, I want to look forward. But looking forward right now doesn't seem that cherry. Each time I see my mom she talks about another food that is going to be eliminated from the house for 3 to 6 months as she takes on chemo and radiation. She says that I can still have it, but that's entirely wrong for me. What if I'm making chicken one day for myself and its the one thing that she wants to eat. I can't possibly bring chicken in this house if she can't eat it.

So, before I get off on another topic, here are the resolutions:

Work:
- I will clean my desk by the end of January.
- I will get one training and/or test for certification
- I will realize that I'm doing my best and that's all that I can do.

Personal:
- I will no longer wink in the online dating. Everyone winks. It's time to write emails.
- I will do whatever it takes to get my mom through all of this and I will not physically harm my sister in the process (although I'm sure it is going to be damn tempting).
- I will go on vacation, even if I have to go by myself and be bored out of my mind. I cannot wait until September when my mother "may" be able to go on vacation with me. I'm getting out of here. I need away from all this craziness.
- I will continue on my diet, no matter how many dietary restrictions my mother gets and no matter how many nights she craves things like Burger King Whoppers (which is what she has been talking about for two weeks!)
- I will exercise, whenever I get the time. It may be dancing with the Wii, but it counts!
- I will try to take care of myself as well as I can. It's going to be hard while taking care of someone else, who isn't going to slow down at all.

Ok, I have to stop this list before I get even more depressed. I feel like I can already chalk up 2008 to being hell. I thought that life was going to get better at some point, but right now, it's just one thing after another. It will be even more difficult if my sister gets the job closer to our house. She'll claim that she is around to "help" but I know my sister. It will be about "free food" and other things. I still can't believe that my mom gave her money for parking at the hospital!